Ok, I admit it being an aspiring actor is pretty selfish.  I mean let’s be real for a second- on a scale of ”   “refugee escaping war torn country with her kids and anytime she finds any food she gives it to her children”  to ” kardashian selfie” ,  being an actor rates pretty high on the selfish scale. Every once in a while in acting classes you’ll overhear someone say ” I really  became an actor because I just want to understand people’s behaviour,(clearly having totally ignored that description in their university catalogue for Pysch 101) and all I can say is  C’MON!!!!!!!!

Acting is all about me. WHICH IS TOUGH- I’ve spent so few times actually being a good friend over the past year because I’ve been asking for help with my lines.   And yea I admit it,  I do want a little payoff, I want people to see the hard work I’ve been putting in!!

But for me if I’m not careful, this can admittedly come with a price- competition.  I’ve found myself in the past judging my performance against my scene partners instead of being ” in it together.”

And I’m not proud of this, but I  know I’ve been known to do this in life too.

-Certainly, in dating life, I have had to consciously ignore the really immature part of me that is dying to share any texts I get with my friends so I can laugh at them

-With friendships,  I think my last post sums up the whole…. ” how am I doing in comparison to”____ nicely.

But why?

These are all people I respect, admire, love… Maybe it’s just too scary to give that much power to someone.

The power to love you,  or  to  be more accomplished than you..and more importantly of course,  to give them the space  to  do that FULLY.

hmmm …Suddenly acting doesn’t seem so selfish after all.